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  Asher threw a yellow colored berry at it. He missed, but the little guy hurried along anyway.

  Now all alone, Asher ate his fruits with little enthusiasm. Stupid Blind Guy and his stupid obsession with playing the hero. Asher banged his head back against the tree and cursed. What if Blind Guy wasn’t going to come back?

  Something small hit Asher on the forehead. He looked to his lap to find a tiny stone. Where had that come from? He directed his gaze to the sky and then to the trees opposite of him. Another stone was aimed at him, and a short giggling later, he spotted the squirrel-thingy sitting on a branch on a tree across from him, ready to throw again.

  “Great…” Asher said, looking up at the furball and showing it his middle finger. He'd picked a fight with a laughing, talking squirrel. Man, his life was weird.

  “Throw that and I'll burn you and eat you for lunch.”

  The creature giggled and threw. Asher caught the stone, hurled it back and missed. The squirrel hopped onto the next tree, running away. Asher gave chase.

  ***

  José walked through the bustling streets, his face turned downward. The lavalight kept a watch out for lizards, but you never knew who else would find him suspicious. Doblis was by far the most diverse town he’d been to since coming to this world. The fairy told him of dryads and fellow elves and dwarfs all sharing the street.

  Needing to get information, José kept his ears open. When he heard people talk in raised voices, he slowed down, listening in.

  “You have no idea!”

  “I'm telling you, this is it! The apocalypse!”

  “They're gifts! Glorious gifts! Be grateful, bastard!”

  That conversation didn’t make any sense, but as José went on down the streets, he could hear a similar argument, straining his ears against the clattering of dishes that came from the house he was passing by.

  “That's always been the problem with you fish-eaters, you ain't got no head for nothing else!” A gruff voice said.

  “We don't need stuff that falls from the sky!”

  “Yeah, you just stick to whatever the ocean pukes up, see where that gets you!”

  Gifts that fell from the sky? What?

  José went up to the pair. “Excuse me?”

  Two bodies turned towards him, one slightly warmer than the other. A merman and a dwarf, as the lavalight told him. “What?” they said as one.

  “Uh…” José wondered how to best phrase his question without sounding too strange. He couldn't think of anything that would make this conversation seem normal. “So these things that are falling from the sky… really convenient, no?”

  For a few seconds they stood in awkward silence. José swallowed and considered turning around and walking away.

  “I think you're missing a fish from your pond, mister,” the dwarf said.

  “Oh, c'mon, it's cool stuff every now and then!” the other one said.

  “You call a bed dropping on some poor guy and killing him cool?”

  “What?” José said, before he could stop himself.

  “You didn't know that?” the guy with the fish affinity said. “Happened just last week, just around the corner… poor kid was so young, too…” He paused for a second before turning to the other stranger. “And you're saying it's a gift!”

  “It's obviously the Gods telling us to rest! Maybe the boy was working too hard!”

  Someone with small feet approached from the left and a new voice entered the conversation. “What if its from another world?” A dreamy voice said. Sounded like a little girl.

  “Run along, kid,” the merman said. “No one believes that. It’s only them criminals putting weird thoughts into your head.”

  “Indeed,” the dwarf said. “Go watch the execution. See where lying will get you!”

  “Execution?” José’s thoughts stopped short. The criminals had to be his friends if they were talking of another world.

  “Have you been living in a tree?” the dwarf said, turning to him. “You can see it in the town square if you hurry along.”

  “I will, thank you, sir.” He stepped away. “Where’s the town square?” he asked the lavalight. Maybe there was still something he could do. There had to be!

  “The town square? Are you stupid? That place is bound to be crawling!”

  “I don’t care, just find it!”

  ***

  Asher chased the squirrel through the forest, shouting profanities while the animal simply laughed. It jumped and ran over twigs and branches, upsetting a few birds on its way.

  “You stupid little—” Asher yelped as the ground rolled away from underneath his foot, making him lose his balance and crash.

  Someone laughed in a high voice as the pain registered in his knees and wrists. “Shit!” He rubbed the dirt off his wrists and looked around in confusion. “What the hell…” Twigs and fallen leaves covered the earth to his feet, but nothing that would have made him stumble. He jumped up and winced as his knees protested the sudden movement. Turning around to look behind himself, his eyes widened in surprise.

  What he’d fallen over was nothing special. Nothing he hadn't seen a million times before. Right there behind him lay a bottle filled with black liquid and a label saying: Coca Cola.

  Asher rubbed his eyes and looked again. It was still there.

  He picked the bottle up and turned it around in his hands, eying it from all sides. “What the hell…” He scanned the backside of the label to confirm that there was no Coke fountain in this world. This bottle was indeed something that came straight from home. Well, the back label said it had been bottled in the UK, anyway.

  Asher frowned at the bottle. Of all the places… Still, it was the closest to home he was going to get right now. Blind Guy had to see this… or… hear about it! Whatever! Asher had to tell him!

  He turned around and lost his enthusiasm when he remembered that he was alone. Not even the squirrel was there anymore.

  “Furball?” He looked around the trees, trying to find the little critter among all the green. Not a chance. Clutching the bottle in his hand he walked deeper into the woods, but found no trace of the little animal. Nothing except for a few colorful insects.

  He pushed his way through the undergrowth. Really, he should just burn this forest down, but then he’d never hear the end of it.

  Eventually, a small lake spread itself out in front of his eyes. The water lay completely still, reflecting a clear blue sky. It looked as if someone had painted it there, too lazy to include ducks, frogs, insects or anything else that would make it interesting.

  Asher decided to take a break and flopped down beside a tree close to the water's edge. He opened the bottle of Coke and almost smiled at the familiar fizzing sound. Thankfully nothing spilled onto him. He hated it when that stuff stuck to his skin.

  Lifting the bottle to his lips, he took a large gulp and grimaced at the taste of warm Coke. Wiping his lips he glared at the bottle. Too bad he didn't have a fridge. He drained the rest of the sugary liquid anyway. All that walking and running around today had made him thirsty enough.

  When Asher was done, he gave the empty bottle one last glance, and threw it into that stupid lake. The water splashed and rippled, at last coming to life.

  What the…

  The surface of the lake broke up. Asher scrambled to his feet and jumped back. The lake erupted like a volcano, spewing water as if it were lava. Only the drops that hit Asher's skin were much colder than lava, and made the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

  None of it mattered given the face of the monster that reared its ugly head out of the middle of the lake. The beast looked like some sort of giant snake. Blue scales shimmered in the sunlight, but did little to distract from the creature's large open mouth and its set of equally large yellow fangs.

  Asher opened his own mouth as he stared up at it, and found himself drenched in a spray of water. Ewww! He shielded his face with his hands against the ongoing attack and screwed his eyes shut
. Something hard bumped against his hands and the water stopped.

  “Take your trash with you!” the monster roared. Asher sucked in a breath and shook his head, drops of water flying everywhere.

  “Bastard!” He glared up at snake-face. The empty bottle of Coke lay at his feet, but he ignored it. Snake-face stared right back at him, unmoving. Or maybe it didn't stare back. Asher couldn't make out any eyes.

  The monster growled.

  Time to bail.

  Asher ran for it, knowing that even in his dragon form, he would be at a disadvantage against all that water. The trees lightened and led him to a small clearing.

  Willing the sun to dry him, Asher let himself fall with his back onto the grass. Maybe it was time to go back and find out whether Blind Guy was still breathing. Blind Guy was his only chance at getting home, after all. Taking a deep breath, Asher told himself that was all there was to it.

  Getting up and looking around, he realized he had no idea where exactly he was, and how to make it back.

  Well, shit.

  Sometimes, just sometimes, he wished he could get into the habit of thinking a little before he did things. Like walking into a forest without caring where he went. He looked up at the sky. The sun still stood high overhead and beat down on him. He had a little time before it would get dark, at least.

  Blind Guy’s words came back to him. If he flew, this would be a piece of cake, but that was a last resort. A very last resort.

  The best option was to back-track to the lake, hope the monster was gone, and find his way from there, maybe he’d see something he remembered.

  The water lay silent when he arrived at the lake. The monster had retreated, but someone else had come. A man clad in black clothes stood at the edge of the lake, peering down into the clear water. Asher approached him from behind, and the man turned.

  “Fangs!” It was the guy from the penguin village. “You’re that vampire.”

  “Asher.” Fangs didn’t seem surprised to see him. “You’re that dragon.”

  “What are you doing here?” Asher remembered all those poisoned army penguins. But Fangs couldn’t be a rebel, could he? He didn’t look like a rebel. More like a Goth, what with the pale skin and the dark clothes. “Why did you want my blood?” Asher asked again before Fangs could answer the first question.

  Fangs shook some water off his hands. “Oh, I don’t know, because it’s so tasty?”

  “Yeah? What do I taste like then?”

  “Chicken?”

  Fang’s was totally kidding him, wasn’t he? “Don’t tell me you had a craving for KFC.”

  “KFC?”

  Asher shook his head. No use trying to joke with these people. “Did you poison those penguins?”

  “Penguins?”

  Asher groaned. “Those little beasts in that village where we met.”

  “You disappoint me, Asher, making assumptions about me just because I’m a half-breed.”

  “You’re a what now?” Blind Guy had said something about mixed race couples and their offspring, hadn’t he? But Asher didn’t see where it applied to Fangs. If he wasn’t a vampire, what was he? “I thought you were a vampire.”

  “You see any pink hair on me? Or red eyes?”

  Asher tried to imagine those colors on Fangs. “Thank God no,” he said. “The pink would clash with the red.”

  Fangs face remained expressionless as he looked at Asher, and then something like a smile cracked his features. “I suppose. But isn’t it time you went back to the city?”

  “The city?” Talking to the vampire, Asher had almost forgotten he had somewhere else to be.

  “Your friend might need some help. You know, the fire elf you were so taken with.”

  “Yeah, he still won’t fuck me.”

  The vampire smiled softly and muttered something that sounded vaguely like, “I know that feeling.” What feeling? Asher shook his head; that wasn’t important.

  “I think he’s getting himself killed.” Asher looked around at the trees. Where had he come from?

  “It’s that way, keep going straight.” Fangs pointed behind Asher to an overgrown path between two old trees.

  “Alright, see ya.”

  “Just keep going!” Fangs called after him. Asher didn’t look around. What else was he going to do?

  He did stop when something blocked the road in front of him. Something large and horse-like and potentially dead. Just lying there on the path. It hadn’t been there before, so what was it doing here now? Asher took a few steps closer to look at the creature. Half-horse, half-man, it wasn’t moving, and it wasn’t breathing. The centaur he’d been running from lay dead in front of him, its features pale.

  Asher swallowed, and he kept going. Both to reach the city, and to get away from the vampire.

  Chapter 8 - The Execution

  Asher made his way back to the enormous walls and entered through the gate. With any luck the lizards wouldn’t even remember him, right? What with all the different smells of food in the air and all those people going about their business. Several dwarfs and penguins were walking the streets. And some people Asher had no idea what to call. People with two heads or three eyes.

  And they were all annoying.

  People were arguing everywhere. Loud enough to be heard through stone walls. It almost felt a bit like home that way.

  Just a few feet in front of Asher, a dwarf stood on the street all by himself, and even he was shouting. Asher wanted to go up to him and give him a piece of his mind, until he heard what the dwarf was actually saying. “DELICIOUS TECK-STEAKS IN ALL FLAVORS ONLY TODAY AT HALF PRICE! GRAB THEM WHILE THEY'RE STILL DEAD!”

  Asher grimaced. No way did he want to eat that. What did that even mean? Asher discarded the thought and walked on. He had to find Blind Guy.

  A lot of people were traveling in the same direction, and Asher decided to go along with them. They had to be on their way to something interesting. Some of them were talking among themselves. Asher caught chunks of conversation like, “Been waiting for this all day,” and, “Serves those bastards right, creating half-breeds… it’s not natural!”

  None of this made sense until the street opened up into a large square that looked like a medieval market place without the markets. A wooden stage stood in the center of it, surrounded by flocks of people of differing sizes. Lizards stood at the side. Fuck.

  Asher was about to turn and leave when he spotted two familiar people on top of the stage.

  Snakes and Stoner. And next to them, a guillotine.

  Asher stopped still. Well, that was bad. If Blind Guy was here, he would freak. Asher scanned the crowd again but couldn’t find him. Looking up at the stage, he swallowed a lump in his throat. For some reason, seeing Snakes and Stoner there gave him the feeling that he should be doing something.

  But first he had to find out whether Blind Guy was around. Asher took a few steps into the crowd. A couple of guys in red uniforms holding spears were posted along the side of the stage. They had to be part of the freak brigade that upheld the rules of this place. There was something elvish about them, but Asher didn't bother with them when he had a very particular elf to find.

  He scanned the crowd again and looked back at Stoner and Snakes. They were so close, he could have shouted out to them, but it was too loud. And there were more people on the stage. Of course, the horse guy wasn't around, but there was some fat man who looked like he would enjoy cutting people's heads off. Behind them, an old geezer with a beard almost down to his feet was strolling the length of the stage from left to right.

  Stoner and Snakes were bound by neon green shackles, but Asher saw no reason they couldn’t use magic. So why weren’t they freeing themselves?

  The incessant chatter around him made it hard to think. Along with the smell of fried food. The thought of food made Asher sick, though he couldn’t say why.

  He should leave, run, before he would be spotted. Just turn around and leave, but he couldn't take his eye
s off Stoner and Snakes and his feet wouldn't move.

  The fat guy on the stage seemed to have no such problems. He approached Stoner, who glared at him. Asher's mouth went dry as the kid was guided to the deadly head-cutting thing in the middle of the stage. The blade glowed red.

  What an ugly way to die.

  With a sudden heat spike, an outcry went through the crowd. Flames materialized and vanished above their heads. Someone tried to use fire magic, and someone else counteracted it. The freak brigade moved. The crowd parted a few feet to Asher’s left.

  Blind Guy!

  “You can't do that! They're not guilty.”

  Only Blind Guy would think that anybody cared.

  He stood his ground, even as the other elves closed in on him. Fucking naive. At least Blind Guy threw up a shield of flames surrounding himself. Of course, that didn't hold for very long. Whoever had dispelled his earlier magic dispelled this one too. The elves surrounded him with their spears.

  One of them was poking his weapon dangerously close. "Sympathizing with the criminals?"

  Two choices presented themselves in front of Asher. The smart thing to do would be to run now while everyone was distracted. The stupid thing would be to try and save Blind Guy. Asher knew people often called him stupid, and maybe they were right, because he could not get himself to flee the scene. Instead, he drew on his powers. Let the magic within himself envelop him, transform him into a dragon.

  When you wanted to draw attention to yourself, there were few things more effective than transforming into an overgrown winged reptile in the middle of a market place.

  "Is that a dragon?" someone in the crowd shouted.

  As if it wasn’t obvious! How many creatures did they know with scales and wings? And how many of those could do this: Opening his mouth wide, Asher spew a blast of fire into the air. Shrieks sounded around him as people edged back.

  "Weren't those fuckers supposed to be extinct?" someone complained. That guy went straight on Asher’s mental list of people to fry later.

  No time now; the freak brigade charged at him with their spears held in front of them.